Sunday, May 9, 2010

BLACK MAMA, WHITE MAMA

Since Danny gave such a fun review of BIG BAD MAMA, I asked him to share his comments on another MAMA movie classic. (This review is also from 2007) Take it away Danny... BLACK MAMA, WHITE MAMA aka WOMEN IN CHAINS (1972, Eddie Romero) simply put, starts out like an episode of CHARLIE'S ANGELS, but then withers into a JOSIE & THE PUSSYCATS cartoon gone awfully awry. 

It begins with our heroines (Black Mama Pam Grier and White Mama Margaret Markov) arriving at the prison somewhere in Central America (although, for some reason most of the extras look Filipino!!!). They are soon treated to a shower where the "meaner of the two mean lesbian matrons" watches the girlie inmates shower and frolic, like that scene in PORKY'S. 

After freshening up, the girls all report to their bunks...and it turns out prison in Central America isn't so much punishment as it is a slumber party! The "meaner of the two mean lesbian matrons" calls on Black Mama that first night, but Pam clearly shows that she doesn't swing that way. This was way before THE L WORD, though I'm not sure she swings that way there either.

The story is totally different when White Mama goes to see miss "meaner of the two mean lesbian matrons" -  Pam calls her out on it and she simply replies, "you had you chance."  I agreed.  Then there were these two sets of bad guys and they wanted something or other from either White Mama or Black Mama...and they all seemed to really, really like the Filipino-looking extras.  

Anyway, for some reason the Mamas were being transferred (maybe to the Tea Party prison?), and we all knew something was going to go all wrong.  I was sure a tidal wave was gonna come and knock the bus over, thus releasing our heroines (I don't know, maybe it's because the location had that miniature look to it...) everyone else thought it would be a train wreck, like in THE FUGITIVE or an "accident" like in ANOTHER 48 HOURS, but nobody guessed it would be the old "yak in the road" ploy! 

Yeah, there's a yak and the bus stops and there's shooting and both mean lesbian matrons get shot dead (as usual)... and our heroines escape, chained together!!! Black Mama tugs on the chain and White Mama says, "I'm not a yo-yo!". Well, she's not!

So they fight, walk through a stream, wrestle, get attacked by a fat guy ( whom they kill and burn up) and lots of other stuff.
But most of all, they learn to get along. Meanwhile, those two sets of bad guys keep tracking them and wanting something from each of them while they continue to enjoy the Filipino girlie extras, of which there seems to be an endless supply. I hope they at least got paid in craft services.

So, finally one set of guys finds the girls, releases them from each other and takes them to a pier where the other set of guys is waiting!!! There's gun fire, things blow up good, Black Mama gets on a boat and White Mama is shot dead. Oops - did I give away the ending? Sorry. The End. Looking forward to the sequel, BLACK MAMA, BIG BAD WHITE MAMA!

Doug gives this one a 6 outta 10. Not great, but enjoyable in small doses.

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