Holiday Leftovers

Here's some holiday season leftovers from last year for your viewing pleasure...

In 1978, the SESAME STREET gang celebrated Christmas TWICE - Once at home on PBS...

and also on CBS with special guest stars ranging from Michael Jackson to Ethel Merman!!!

'TWAS THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS was a Rankin-Bass animated special that still airs annually on cable. I always found it charming except for it's odd depiction of Santa's red nose and cheeks. He looked freakish to me.

What do you think?

Meanwhile, back in the Stone Age, The Flintstones are celebrating the birth of Christ before it even happened.

In fact The Flintstones celebrate Christmas through time travel as seen here where they frolic with  anthropomorphic animals from the 1960s and the Jetsons, from the far future.

Even 'tweenage Peebles and Bamm-Bamm get in on the holiday fun.

Betty Rubble is absent from this gathering, she must be baby-sitting Boo-Boo Bear who is also not present.

Here Yogi Bear, sans Boo-Boo is taking a turn at playing Santa.

And here Yogi is "helping" Santa...or is he helping himself to Ranger Smith's new skis?

And finally here's Yogi and Boo-Boo decorating their tree with painted snowballs. Shouldn't they be hibernating?

Looks like Tom & Jerry have put all their feuding aside for the holidays - and Jerry's found himself a little gray mousefriend to celebrate with! Hope all my readers and friends have a wonderful holiday season whether they are spending it on Sesame Street, in Bedrock or in Jellystone Park. Peace on Earth and all that.

Liz Taylor 1932-2011

Let's celebrate the life of the great Liz Taylor by representing a post from four years ago when this blog was called MOVIES THAT MAKE YOU SAY 'HUH?' and I inducted Ms. Taylor into the first "Huh? Hall of Fame".
Well, you just gotta love Liz Taylor. She was a friggin' legend - living a glamourous public life and starring in some of cinema's greatest films like GIANT, CAT ON A HOT TIN ROOF, WHO'S AFRAID OF VIRGINIA WOOLF?– not to mention cherished classics like LASSIE COME HOME, NATIONAL VELVET and FATHER OF THE BRIDE. Outside of film, Dame Elizabeth's devotion to ending the AIDS epidemic is truly inspiring and she really is a INTERnational treasure.

Then there's the other Ms. Taylor, the Liz that mades me say "Huh?". This is the Liz Taylor that was friends with Michael Jackson, (Editor's note: this post originally ran in 2007) markets crappy perfume...and the one that married Larry Fortensky. This is the Liz that starred (or appeared in) some of the worst films ever made. The Liz that played Pearl Slaghoople in THE FLINTSTONES movie. A casting choice so bizarre and inept, that many years later and it still makes me say "Huh?" I mean look at the evidence: I rest my case.

But the craziness did not start in Bedrock in 1994. Let's turn the clocks back a bit to 1960 and BUTTERFIELD 8. Liz actually won an Oscar for this film in which she plays a slutty, drunken "fashion model" (aka prostitute) who falls in love an alcoholic son of a working class family who has married into money. Liz made the film to get out of her contract with MGM, so she could jump over to 20th-Century Fox to star in the epic CLEOPATRA (more on this one later). Taylor's conditions for agreeing to make BUTTERFIELD 8 included shooting the film in New York, having control over costumes, hair and giving husband Eddie Fisher (freshly divorced from America's sweetheart Debbie Reynolds) a supporting role. She publicly campaigned against the film: "I hate the girl I play, " she told the press, "This is the most pornographic script I have ever read!" The public, titillated by Taylor and the provocative subject matter, made the film a hit. "I still say it stinks" recanted Liz. After finishing production on BUTTERFIELD 8, Taylor, and freed from MGM's clutches, shew flew to London to begin work on CLEOPATRA, the biggest budgeted film up till that time.

In 1963, Liz also became the highest paid movie star AND worked with future husband Richard Burton (who was cast as Mark Antony) for the first time. The press had a field day when Taylor and Burton began an torrid and scandalous affair during filming – both stars were married to other people at the time!!! The Vatican even accused her of "erotic vagrancy"!!! That's pretty damn cool The production itself was plagued by many problems, and director Joe Mankiewicz' original cut was six hours long. Fox demanded that two hours be cut, which they were, thankfully. When the film was released historians criticized it's inaccuracies, critics attacked the disjointed script and the over-the-top acting was laughed at universally, causing filmgoers to wonder how a film maker could get such great actors to act so badly.

After a string of better films in the mid-60s, Liz and Dick returned to Huh?-ville in 1968 with a little something we like to call BOOM! Freely adapted from Tennessee Williams' play "The Milk Train Doesn't Stop Here Anymore", BOOM! is the oddest, most pretentious "art film" ever made. It's almost indescribable. But if you EVER get the chance to see it - Run!!!

Liz spent much of the 1970s making mediocre films for theaters and TV, appearing on talks shows, Bob Hope specials and playing herself on HERE'S LUCY. In 1978, she showed up in - of all places - a musical! In A LITTLE NIGHT MUSIC, Liz delivers a poorly dubbed rendition of "Send in the Clowns". Isn't it rich?

In 1981, during the peak of the daytime soap opera fad, Liz showed up for a short stint on GENERAL HOSPITAL, playing Helena Cassadine. The character has lived on, though Liz has never revisited the role. After THE FLINTSTONES debacle, Liz participated in an ill-concieved ABC TV-movie aimed at gay men who missed THE GOLDEN GIRLS. Entitled THESE OLD BROADS, this "event" gathered together for the first (and LAST!) time: Liz Taylor, Debbie Reynolds (Liz's longtime nemesis) , Shirley MacLaine (who had played Debbie in POSTCARDS FROM THE EDGE) and Joan Collins (who took over the role of Pearl Slaghoople in THE FLINTSTONES sequel). I can recall this being among the two of the most painful hours ever spent in front of the TV - rivaling the infamous MARY & RHODA reunion movie. To top it all off, poor Liz delivered all her scenes from a sickbed!!!

Well, in spite of it all - we still love her and were were proud to have Dame Elizabeth Rosemond Taylor as first inductee into the "Huh?" Hall of Fame! She was an angel and she will be missed.

The Network That Slept Through Christmas...

Please enjoy this rerun from Christmas 2008. When I think of the classic Christmas TV specials of my youth, I usually associate most of the classics with CBS. RUDOLPH THE RED-NOSED REINDEER (1964), FROSTY THE SNOWMAN (1969), HOW THE GRINCH STOLE CHRISTMAS (1966) and A CHARLIE BROWN CHRISTMAS (1965) all aired on CBS for most of the 1970s and 80s, even though ABC now airs THE GRINCH and CHARLIE BROWN. (How could the suits at CBS let those go???). ABC had it's own stable of regulars back then including the RUDOLPH'S SHINY NEW YEAR and FROSTY'S WINTER WONDERLAND (both 1976) sequels, the SANTA CLAUS double-header (1970's ...IS COMING TO TOWN and 1974's THE YEAR WITHOUT A...) and other cool stuff like Chuck Jones' A VERY MERRY CRICKET (1973).NBC, on the other hand had THE LITTLE DRUMMER BOY (Books 1 and 2-1968 and 1976, respectively) and, um...
THE BEAR WHO SLEPT THROUGH CHRISTMAS (1973)! I remember watching this - and loving it, after all I was 9 years old.
 
But why did it fade away like so many other NBC holiday specials? I know that RUDOLPH actually premiered on NBC, but found a home on CBS. My all-time favorite MISTER MAGOO'S CHRISTMAS CAROL (1962) also first aired on NBC, but it found a lasting legacy as a syndicated special. This is one of my favorite scenes:

Some of the other NBC "lost classics" include THE TINY TREE (premiered on NBC in 1975 - then rerun on ABC and CBS!), B.C.: A SPECIAL CHRISTMAS (1971), THE FAMILY CIRCUS CHRISTMAS (1979) and THE LITTLE RASCALS CHRISTMAS (1979). Most of these aired once or twice and then disappeared forever.Some others like JACK FROST (1979), THE STINGIEST MAN IN TOWN (1978), A FLINTSTONES CHRISTMAS (1977) eventually made it to cable and home video. So where is the vault that holds all these great animated shows - and how do we get it to open??? Yes - aside from the few that are now avialable on dvd (Notably the Rankin-Bass productions) - where have all the others gone? And so, now you know the sad tale of The Network That Slept Through Christmas.

THE FLINTSTONES turn 50...

In honor of the occasion, here's something I first posted a couple of years ago.

Presenting FLINTSTONES Bubble Club Fun Bath (that's a mouthful!) - which I guess was some sort of bubble bath potion that sold for 39 cents. This chlorinated soap was so powerful it even washed the ginger right outta Pebbley Poo's red locks and made her into a bleach blonde!Well, Pebbles seems to be having a gay old time while the world's strongest infant, Bamm-Bamm merely looks embarrassed - or like he just made some bubbles of his own. What's the most disturbing about this package is the SPECIAL PICTURE OFFER that is featured on the back of the box. What kind of perverted pictures are these bubble bath manufacturers foisting upon their customers? I don't know - but if the title of this book tells us anything...I'm calling Bedrock Dept. of Social Services.What was the witch going to do with all that jizzle anyway? And did Pebbles and Bamm-Bamm fill their buckets with it? THIS JUST IN - For those of you who think the above book cover is a fake, here's another edtion of the same book that I just found online: Apparently I'm not the first blogger to come across this oddly-titled children's book. Colleen Kane over at Baton Rogue is the New Bklyn blogged about it last year. She even pictures a THIRD edition of the book featuring a MORE GRAPHIC cover which shows the man-ish "witch" and Bamm-Bamm stirring up a bucket of green goo. Witch jizzle? Ewwww...To cleanse of palate of such putrid pre-historic pornography, here's something adorable...
Doesn't that just melt a wicked witch's jizzle-free heart? Also available on vinyl.As a friend of teen-age Pebbles and Bamm-Bamm, Bad Luck Schleprock would say, "Wowsie, wowsie, woo-woo."

Thank God It's Friday the 13th

Here's a fun & funky Friday flashback!
My other half recently told me that in addition to chocolate bunnies, his parents gave actual Easter presents every year. In the late 70s, one of his gifts was the THANK GOD IT'S FRIDAY soundtrack album - which he still has and sometimes forces me to listen to (today, for example, all THREE discs). In celebration of that odd holiday memory, we watched the movie version of the album as well.
I first saw THANK GOD IT'S FRIDAY at a drive-in in New Jersey when I was about 14. Everyone was hoping for another SATURDAY NIGHT FEVER. I remember thinking back then that the film was more like an episode of THE LOVE BOAT instead of an actual movie. Except THE LOVE BOAT usually had more plot and bigger name actors. I was a very wise 14 year old.

When a film starts with the Columbia logo lady disco dancing, you know you're in for a "good" time. While not as cool as the Wilma Flintstone version of the Columbia logo (from THE MAN CALLED FLINTSTONE) - this is pretty cool.As the credits roll, and the theme song blares, we see a montage of "getting ready scenes" that would make my friend Brett's head explodes (he LOVES movies with "getting ready scenes" - like ROLLER BOOGIE, for example). As all our characters are preparing for their night out we see that Jeff Goldblum and Debra Winger are among the cast...and Donna Summer (who gets special billing) as Nicole! Let's see if I can accurately report on what actually does happen in this film.

We see wacky dental assistant named Jackie who takes a deep inhale of nitrous oxide and puts on a pink wig - eventually dressing like a whorish clown for her drug-infused night out. It's interesting how the film is very non judgemental in her recreational use of drugs, but the poster makes her sound like she's a refugee from VALLEY OF THE DOLLS.

We see Donna (in her first "acting" role) as she begs a shopkeeper to stay open because she wants to buy a special dress - presumably to wear for her big night out at the disco.
We see two awkward high school girls (Frannie & Jeannie) stumbling off a bus in platform shoes - and we learn that they want to win the big dance contest so they can buy KISS tickets (the film was co-produced by Casablanca Records).  Jeannie is played by Terri Nunn, who later went on to greater fame as the lead singer of Berlin.

We see a married yuppie couple (Dave & Sue) celebrating their fifth wedding anniversary - only he's an uptight cpa and wants her to go home and play with his wooden pepper mill, but she wants to go to the disco and really let loose.

We see two JAPs - Maddy, who spills a cola all over her flat chest and Jennifer (Debra Winger) who sponges it up with a burger! (No photo available)

We see two kinda gay-ish nerds (Carl & Ken) smoking pot as they drive to the disco. Carl is played by songwriter Paul Jabara.  Ken is wearing a yellow sweater.

We see a young, dashing Jeff Goldblum as Tony DiMarco, the owner of The Zoo - a real ladies man with a snazzy sportscar. His Christmas colored suit looks like a Joker costume. Note: Because the club is named The Zoo, a guy in a gorilla suit runs the elevator! Zany!

There's all sorts of silly parking lot chaos outside the Zoo disco, resulting in Tony's precious car taking a few hits - while inside we meet DJ Bobby Speed - who's all psyched because tonight's show is being broadcast live on the radio. Donna sneaks in to see him, and begs him to play her record tonight. He tells her the Commodores (featuring Lionel Ritchie) are tonight's big attraction, not her.

Meanwhile, the high school girls keep getting denied entrance again & again while nerdy Carl declares that the Zoo is "like Disneyland with tits" and then he and Ken put on lip gloss to attract chicks. Huh? Then a guy is shown in drag shaving his chest in the mens' room, but he later gets rejected by dragaphobic Ken.

We soon meet a mismatched computer date couple: a fat trash-collecting asshole named Gus and a pathetic tall bookworm named Shirley. He wants nothing to do with her, but she can't stop clinging to him. At this point I realize that this is LA - but everyone has thick New Yawk accents!

Showing up next is Marv Gomez the Leatherman. Don't ask. The high school girls latch on to Marv and beg him to help them get into the club, so he sneaks them in through the men's room window. Only a Leatherman would think of that!

At some point Donna barges into the booth and starts singing "Love to Love Ya Baby" over the mike and pisses off DJ Bobby. Meanwhile, some roadie dude named Floyd is lost with the Commodores' instruments - and he eventually gets pulled over by the cops, twice - and is accused of stealing the instruments - so he has to demonstrate each one, twice. Racial profiling at its worst.

Some sleazy guy comes onto klutzy Jennifer, but she rejects him. Then Maddy keeps cockblocking her. (Does that word work here? I guess...) The married couple argue and decide go their own ways at the club: Sue gets romanced by Tony, who plans on fucking her, while Jackie the Hygienist Junkie gets Dave to pop pills with her.After striking out with some gals, Leatherman gives Carl & Ken a lesson in how to be gay with a ridiculous dance number in the parking lot.Something happens that makes Bobby the DJ says "the N word" and the he finally gets security to drag Donna away. Shocking!

Back to our blinddate mismatch couple: Shirley is following Gus around. Calls her an "old maid" - then she punches him - and he falls for her. Awww...just like THE LOVE BOAT!

Sue notices that her husband is having a good time and reacts by calling Jackie "a hippie!" Now she wants to go home and Dave doesn't! Tony wants her to stay too–so he can have his filthy way with her! Besides, he has a bet with DJ Bobby that he'll land her!

High school girl Frannie enters dance contest - and somehow suddenly Donna starts singing "Last Dance" over the music, noise & yelling. The DJ likes it - of course - and Donna brings down the house.

The Commodores finally perform when their instruments show up. After Carl gets locked in a stairwell, Debra Winger and Ken hook up. Everybody is doing poppers and dancing. Then the most unorganized dance contest begins. Who's judging? Who's hosting? Gays with tambourines (not Carl & Ken) get disqualified first. What's up with that?Dave (renamed "Babbakazoo" by Jackie) is now high as a kite and he swings across the club on a Tarzan vine - Frannie wins the dance competition and a giant trophy! She declares that "We're Disco Queens Now!" and then she and Jeannie join Marv at another disco for the 1AM dance contest.The married couple reunites, while out in the parking lot, Tony's sportscar self-destructs. As Jennifer and Ken share the last dance, Donna comes back to the booth to fuck the DJ. The end. Can I go home now???

Does any of this make sense? It's all just a silly excuse to have a three-LP soundtrack. I just wonder why no one ever turned it into a weekly TV series. Imagine the possibilities....