PRIVATE PARTS

More goodies from the past...circa 2009...
I've heard and read about PRIVATE PARTS (1972, directed by Paul Bartel) for years. I knew the late Mr. Bartel from his modest art house hits EATING RAOUL and SCENES FROM THE CLASS STRUGGLE IN BEVERLY HILLS as well as his camp classics DEATH RACE 2000 and LUST IN THE DUST, but somehow PRIVATE PARTS managed to escape me.When my friend Jeff brought over the dvd a few weeks ago and showed me the trailer, I knew that we'd soon have to get together to watch it - and I'm so glad we did. This is MY kinda Friday night flick.
The story goes like this: runaway teen Cheryl (cute and perky Ayn Ruymen) and her best friend Judy (munchkin-faced Ann Gibbs) are living in dumpy L.A. apartment. When Judy catches Cheryl watching her and her latest suitor Mike having filthy, dirty sex, Cheryl takes off (with Judy’s wallet) and winds up downtown at the rundown King Edward Hotel - where her eccentric Aunt Martha (the terrific Lucille Benson, later on BOSOM BUDDIES) lives and manages the building. Uncle Orville and her daughter have gone to live with Jesus, so Cheryl is her only family.

Martha agrees to let Cheryl to stay at the hotel temporarily, and we soon meet the madcap residents of the dilapidated building - including a perverted priest named Rev. Moon (Disney mainstay Laurie Main), a crazy old lady named Mrs. Quigley (Dorothy Neumann), who is looking for a girl named “Alice” and a quiet weirdo named George (John Ventantonio), who we later learn is an avant garde photographer.Aunt Martha's hobby is attending funerals of strangers to photograph their souls leaving their bodies, oh and she has a white pet rat named "Whitey". When Martha goes out funeral-hopping one afternoon and locks Cheryl in the apartment, things start to get a little weird. First Cheryl accidentally kills Whitey and then shoves him down the food disposal. Yikes! Then she sneaks out of the apartment and explores the building (much like Alice in Wonderland) and we learn various things about the building and the people that dwell there.

For instance, Rev. Moon has a collection of male physique pin-ups, Mrs. Quigley sunbathes in her apartment and George has a shrine devoted to the mysterious "Alice".

When friend Judy's hunky blond boyfriend Mike (Len Travis) shows up looking for Cheryl, his visit is abruptly cut short when he loses his head. Literally. Then Judy shows up looking for Mike and she soon meets her maker as well.Meanwhile, oblivious to all this bloodshed, Cheryl befriends a cute, but nerdy hardware store worker named Jeff (MY THREE SONS star Stanley Livingston).

Jeff seems romantically interested in Cheryl but she is somewhat intrigued by the mysterious George, who has now began pursuing her in a stalker-ish kind of way.

Lots of crazy stuff follows, but I would not want to spoil it here, because I cannot recommend PRIVATE PARTS any more highly.

But suffice to say, there's some kinky stuff that happens involving Cheryl in a bedazzling Spider-Woman costume, a scene involving blood injected into a sex doll and a there's shocking twist end that it's not too much of a shock if you watch the trailer first. So don't.

To me, Paul Bartel has created an almost perfect black comedy and a terrifically twisted horror film all in one. Composer Hugo Friedhofer's amazing score brings to mind the great Bernard Herrmann / Hitchcock collaborations and helps elevate the whole affair to another level.

This film gets a 10 outta 10. Enjoy!

Naughty & Nice - Holiday Pin-Ups

From 2008 : Since a certain nameless blog listing service turned down Dougsploitation because it considered it "pornography" - I decided to put my money shots where their mouths are and share some slightly sexy photos from Santa's private collection.

First up, we have everybody's favorite Batgirl, Yvonne Craig showing some skin as she poses among some brightly wrapped packages spilling out of Old St. Nick's big sleigh.

Next up we have a classic James Bidgood photo of a hunky young man (circa 1966). Looks like somebody has already started unwrapping their present!

Yvonne's back, this time looking pert and stylish as she poses with a smiling snowman in front of a lovely decorated holiday window.

Meanwhile, a twinky blonde caroler has arrived with quite an assortment of gifts for some lucky recipient. This is another shot from a Bidgood collection called Holiday.

Entertaining - Dougsploitation Style

I've been thinking about entertaining lately. I'm not sure if it's because of recent acquisition of my mother's old cookbooks and entertaining guides, or seeing JULIE & JULIA, or my little obsession with The Food Network, but something about the quickly approaching season of Autumn makes me want to entertain more than usual. I wonder if those old books can help me out...
Hmmm...I wonder what "The Surprising Difference" was? Let's see, Susie's a California blond in a yellow kitchen, talking on a yellow phone. Her yellow and orange apron matches the wallpaper behind her. She just finished frosting some yellow cupcakes and it looks like a gelatinous "St. Joseph's Aspirin for children" flavored bundt cake is on the counter in front of her. I would guess the "The Surprising Difference" is that the pot of coffee is the only non-citrus item allowed in her kitchen?

I know, not really funny.
Meanwhile, in the rec room downstairs, the triplets (Midge, Kitty and Bitsy) have invited a few cleancut young lads over to a) listen to records b) play the guitar c) dance d) stuff their faces at the buffet. Check out that sexy surfer poster on the wall!
Later that night, with the triplets already in bed. Susie dons her avocado evening gown (you know, the one that came with the matching candles) for a romantic dinner with - hey who's that dude? That's not Bill! Bill's away on a business trip with Uncle Stan.
Well, whoever that guy was - he stayed for dinner AND breakfast the next morning. Susie has baked some fresh muffins and poured some of that coffee from yesterday.

She had time to put her hair up and to give her gentleman friend a gift - a yellow sweater to match her outfit and the "muffin cozy" to a t!
Meanwhile, in a different time zone, Bill is making friends with a lady in red. Uncle Stan has found him a new friend too. These guys really know how to "enjoy the Lively Life!" while they are away on business. Wonder if they can put hookers on their expense reports? So what have I learned so far? Wear lots of yellow, always have a handy buffet nearby and if you can't be with the one you love, love the one you're with.

Thanks, Susie (and Stephen Stills).

Guess Who's Playing Santa! (a little contest)

From the December 1963 Issue of Good Housekeeping, the tantalizing Miss Tammy Grimes and her eight St. Nicks.I'm particularly fond of Santa #7. Any guesses to whom these famous fellas might be?

The first reader to correctly identify all 8 guys gets an extra special prize.
Here's some clues: 

Number 1 is a Broadway Legend. 

Number 2 is very popular this time of the year. 

Number 3 is famous for playing a character that is mentioned throughout my blog. 

Number 4 was a comic genius. 

Numbers 5 & 6 are a couple of rats. 

Number 7 is still alive. 

Number 8 is probably best known by today's audiences in animated form. 

I'll publish the answers in a few days, or after I get a correct submission. The prize? Perhaps a home-made Dougsploitation Christmas cd featuring my top rare & unusual Christmas favorites! Happy guessing, kids!

Worst TV Show Ever?

I love Lynda Carter and I like Loni Anderson a lot. Then I should have really liked PARTNERS IN CRIME - shouldn't I have?From 1984, this "high concept" NBC mystery series told the story of Carole (Lynda) and Sydney (Loni), who had nothing in common but an ex-husband! Carole is a former society matron, who is now flat-broke and trying to make a go at it as a photographer. Sydney is a con-man's daughter, a thief and she also plays the bass! When their shared ex is murdered, he wills his private investigation agency to them both! Of course after they solve his murder, they decided to become private eyes together. What a wacky idea for a TV series - TWO fishes out of water and one Odd Couple! I remember being excited when this show was announced (I must have been high) - and then being embarrassed about watching it. Luckily the curvaceous co-stars escaped this mess to do better work. Lynda went on to great small roles in films like SUPER TROOPER and SKY HIGH and, er Loni resurfaced in continuing rolls on shows like NURSES, THE MULLETS and SO NOTORIOUS. Hmmm - "Dougsploitation Hall of Fame"... I think we have a nominee...after all she also starred in...
For much more info on PARTNERS IN CRIME go here.